"I'm not the massage-type"

I've heard this from a number of people over the years. I love it when someone comes to me for a massage and says this. They tell me either that this is their first "real" massage or that they've been massaged before and they had an awful experience. I consider this person as an even greater gift because now I have a challenge on my hands.

The first thing I try to find out is why they think they're not a "massage-type". I've heard a few different answers to this question. Some people feel this way because they think that they can't relax with a stranger. Others feel that they can't relax at all - especially with someone touching them. Some people actually feel guilty because it feels so good and they're not doing anything. Some people are so identified with being type "A" personalities that they consider relaxing a weakness. Finally, some people believe that if they relax for even a moment of time their entire world is going to crash around them.

Well, for all of you massage-challenged people out there - let me tell you - DON'T RELAX!!! That's what I tell these people that come to see me. Why are they in my office in the first place? Because they are in so much dire pain and no one is able to make it go away and they're at their wits end at trying to live with the pain after trying everything under the sun to make the pain go away.

Ah, the massage-challenged. I love them more. They become my challenge. What I try to do in this case is to put myself in their shoes. See things from their perspective. Wow, I might say - you do have an incredibly busy life. I can totally understand why you feel like you can't let go of things. Your situation sounds really difficult. The problem now though, is that all of this work and stress that you're under is getting locked up in your neck or in your back and while your brain and your will is absolutely up for the job that you're in or stress you put yourself under, your body is on strike.

Muscles are much like union workers. They are happy to do their job under optimal working conditions, appropriate vacation time, sick and personal days, benefits and limited working hours. When a person endures extended periods of a stressful lifestyle they put their physiology in a state of stress. Usually stressed out people are not excercising, eating correctly, drinking enough water, sleeping enough and these conditions just put you and your body in a cycle of distress. You cycle out of control until you hit a wall - you wake up one morning and you can't turn your neck or you get a migraine or you somehow injure yourself or something happens. Your body goes on strike until you can mediate some sort of new contract with yourself.

That's where I come in - Medical massage is a non-threatening idea for these type-A, massage-challenged types. A comprehensive, focused approach gives a beginning, middle and end to their physical problem. During the massage we may or may not talk about what's going on that's stressing you. We work together and target the pain and I try to build a connection between you and your body. It's a very effective and non-threatening approach for the massage-challenged person.